Here’s how God Awful things are for the Democrats right now.

Nancy Pelosi is acting like the sane one of the bunch.

I think I’m gonna be sick.

On Seinfeld, they call that “Bizarro World.”

While the Far Left wing of the Democrat party and their nutty base are still screaming for impeachment…Aunt Nancy knows damn well THAT would be political suicide.

Still, House Judiciary Committee Chairman and human weeble Jerry Nadler, and his partner in crime, House Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff, whose bug eyes are a dead ringer for Vincent Price in…and AS…The Fly,” circa 1958…can’t seem to come to grips with the NO COLLUSION reality. Continue reading →

I get Donald Trump.  I get him.  I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing…it just is.

Maybe it’s because I’m originally from Queens like him.  Maybe it’s because I ALSO absolutely relish saying shit that I KNOW drives people batty.  

Ya know, just for the reaction.

Maybe it’s all of that.  Or none of that.

I don’t know.

But I do know one thing…not much of what The Donald does or says is by accident.  Stream of consciousness rally riffing and unfettered exaggerations notwithstanding…he passively attacks his opponents by simply saying or tweeting things that HE KNOWS will send them off the deep end.

But why? 

Easy.  They get hysterical and unglued.  They can’t think straight.  Raging rage.

And most importantly… IT.  GETS.  THEM.  OFF.  THEIR.  GAME. Continue reading →

I have quite a sentimental affinity for Creepy Joe Biden.

You see…Bumbling Biden played an instrumental role in losing my blogging virginity on August 17, 2016, in an aptly titled dissertation called “Crazy Uncle Joe.”

It was basically a response to a campaign speech he delivered somewhere while stumping for Crooked Hillary.  I methodically and gleefully tore apart every stupid Trump-Hating sentiment he regurgitated with the usual hysterical breathless fury.

Angry bastards, those Democrats.  Some things never change.

This time, however, I’m gonna stick up for Creepy Joe…and I DO say that affectionately.  I’m sorry, but I’m not down with the Sniveling Socialist grievance mob making him twist in the wind like a palm tree in a hurricane. Continue reading →

President Trump…fresh off the long-awaited conclusion of the strength-sapping and corruptly conceived Russian Collusion investigation, starring Bob Mueller…no Collusion, no Obstruction, zippo…celebrated last week with a raucous rally in Michigan with 15,000 of his closest friends.

Not to mention the 20,000 poor bastards that couldn’t get in.

Like King Kong busting out of his shackles…It’s The Donald…UNLEASHED!

HIDE THE CHILDREN!

He dropped the “BS” word in its full and utter glory.

He officially anointed California Congressman, part-time Russian conspiracy theorist, and full-time Trump-Hating Douche-Bag, Adam Schiff, as “Pencil Neck.”

I swear, Trump majored in Business and minored in nicknames.

On the one hand, the favorable end of the Mueller investigation jacked-up his swagger.

On the other hand…how can you even tell? Continue reading →

A political happy ending, indeed.

No, NOT of the “Robert Kraft South Florida Asian Massage Parlor” variety.

Sickos.

It’s the merciful end to the 22 month Bob Mueller Russian collusion witch hunt….conceived on a pretense more false than the room full of triple D’s in a plastic surgeon’s office on Rodeo Drive.

No Collusion.  No Obstruction.  No more indictments.  No nothing.  Nada.

A little summary, if I might…

500 witnesses interviewed.
2800+ subpoenas issued
500 search warrants executed.
20 Full Time Federal Prosecutors
40 Full Time FBI Agents
675 Days
Multiple lives ruined forever
Unlimited Funding
Unlimited Time

Phew! Continue reading →

Any old raisin-head baseball fan out there…like me…will surely remember the famed Killer B’s of the Houston Astros WAY back in the 90’s.

Biggio.  Bagwell.  Berkman.  Bell.

If you think Hillary’s presidential dreams were unmercifully crushed, you never saw these dudes have their way with a hanging curve.

Anyway, we have a new crop of Killer B’s among us…better known as the 2020 Democrat front-runners.

In no particular order…

Bernie.  Beto.  Biden.

BARF! Continue reading →

Surely you’ve heard of them.  I wish I hadn’t.  Alexandria Ocasio-Dumbass…er…Cortez.  Ilhan Omar.  Rashida Tlaib.  Phew, that’s a mouthful (insert inappropriate joke here ________).  All newly elected freshman Congresswomen from New York, Minnesota, and Michigan, respectively.

It appears Anti-Semitic, America-Hating Socialist Congresswomen come in three’s.  Like famous people dying.  And blind mice.

With apologies to Curley, Moe, and Larry (sorry Shemp, but screw you), I have brilliantly anointed these three empty-headed morons The Three Stoogettes.  

And while I possess no actual video of it, I can completely visualize them bopping each other on the coconut with mallets somewhere in the back of the House Chamber, causing them to spew stupid, offensive shit every time they flap their gums.

And like a Botox shortage, they’re Nancy Pelosi’s worst nightmare. Continue reading →

Did any of you happen to catch the thing of beauty that was The Donald’s CPAC (Conservative Political Action Conference) keynote speech last Saturday? 

My God. 

At just over two hours, his longest speech ever…completely off script…stream of consciousness riffing reminiscent of a Robin Williams appearance on Johnny Carson’s Tonight Show couch 30 years ago.

So…once I recovered enough from basking in the sheer joy of being so fully and wonderfully entertained, I pondered a couple of random thoughts… Continue reading →

I’ll bet you my entire 401k that 99% of the country never heard of this schmuck lefty actor Jussie Smollett before he let Trump Derangement Syndrome hijack his better senses.    

I know I didn’t.

You’ll have to take my word for it, but I was damn sure this abhorrent stunt he pulled…one that could very well have started race riots across the country…was more of a hoax than Bob Mueller’s boondoggle, Trump’s “Secret Russian Agent” status, Al Gore’s and AOC’s 24/7 proclamations of impending climate doom…maybe even Sasquatch, for shit’s sake.

Ok, maybe not Sasquatch. Continue reading →

Anyone that’s read my blog even once or twice is well aware of my complete and utter disdain for the lying left-wing propagandists in the Fake News Media.  It may go without saying, but I’m of course referring to the NATIONAL media…the major TV networks, NY Times, WaPost…and other such liberal activist rags that are only good for one thing…house training puppies.

Or maybe lining the bottom of Polly’s bird cage.  OK, fine…that’s two things.

I really do believe, however, that local newspapers and TV stations, generally speaking, do a pretty decent job of reporting on state and local issues.  And it’s not that those newsrooms aren’t chock full of liberal Trump-hating nuts.

They are.  

It’s just that, typically, there’s not much need for slanted, leftist advocacy reporting when you’re doing stories on things like controversial zoning issues and police blotter crap…trailer fires, drug deals gone bad, or some pervert in a tattered raincoat flashing an unsuspecting soccer mom fondling cantaloupes at the local Safeway. Continue reading →