Does it feel like the whole world is spinning out of control, or is it just my hangover?

The chaos is palpable…so many issues to comment on…I’m having complete sensory overload.  I just want to hide in a dark room and drown myself in a bottle of single malt scotch.

Ya know, the good 18 year stuff, not that 12 year rot gut you carry in a crumpled brown bag in your glove compartment.  Cheap booze tends to heighten one’s misery exponentially.

Trust me on that.

Or maybe just forgo the booze (GASP!) and drown myself in hand sanitizer.

Anyway, I’ll go as rapid fire and cover as much ground as I can… Continue reading →

Rahm Emmanuel…ex-Congressman, ex-Obama Chief-of-Staff, ex-Chicago Mayor…famously said, “You never want a serious crisis to go to waste.”

Now, I will concede that quote has a myriad of interpretations, not all of which are nefarious in nature.

However, in the Age of Trump, it has only a single interpretation…

BLUDGEON TRUMP NO MATTER WHAT…TRUTH BE DAMNED.

And we’re seeing it full-on with this Coronavirus…as we have with every other “crisis,” real or perceived.

With all the fake news and purposely ginned-up, hair-on-fire hysteria by the media and Left surrounding the Coronavirus, a critical piece of news and context gets completely buried.

At the end of January when this Coronavirus crap was in its infancy, Trump halted all travel from China to the U.S., as well as ordering the quarantine of Americans traveling in the region upon their return.

And these Libtards went completely loco.  Yeah…even more than usual. Continue reading →

Ya know, I try to watch these Democratic debates, I really do.  I mean, I’m a political junkie, I write a political blog…AND I’m a glutton for punishment.

Making great strides with my therapist on the latter.

And speaking of strides…the Democrats made monumental ones last week with their, what, 67th debate?

All the other ones were practically unwatchable…ya know, like actual footage of a C-Section on one of those medical channels, or Rosie O’Donnell getting undressed.

Ew on both counts.

But last week was completely different..and inevitable. Continue reading →

So obvious…yet so genius.

President Trump, storming into the Daytona 500…no pun intended as rain storms washed out the race on Sunday, delaying it a day.

Still, just an awesome spectacle…which incidentally delivered the The Daytona 500’s best TV ratings in five years.  And I ask you…who loves ratings more than our Reality TV President?

I mean, what bigger collection of Trumpsters than at that wonderful little piece of Americana.

Like Ivory Soap…99.44% pure Trump supporters.

And The Donald, ever the Showman, leads the drivers in a pace lap around the track in the presidential limousine, appropriately named “THE BEAST.”

Talk about kicking it up a notch.  TOTAL.  BAD.  ASS. Continue reading →

I never knew that Newton’s third law of motion…“for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction”…applied to politics too.

In the Age of Trump…ANYTHING’S possible.

It seemed that every blazing success the President enjoyed last week, those poor bastards on the Left experienced equal and opposite…and, yes…well-deserved, misery.

Truly an interesting mash-up of physics and politics Newton surely never dreamed of.

Trump’s acquittal in the Senate Impeachment Trial Hoax…while more predictable than Michael Moore’s Type 2 Diabetes…certainly led the success orgy.

The day before, of course, was another stellar State of the Union address that reveled in three years of “Promises Made, Promises Kept” accomplishments that even Helen Keller could clearly see Made America Effing Great Again.  Continue reading →

So, getting the hell out of Dodge for a few days for some R&R…hence, the slightly earlier than usual blog update.

And since timing is everything, and mine always sucks…will be bloviating next week on the Iowa caucus debacle, tonight’s State of the Union Address, and Trump’s inevitable acquittal in the impeachment con job.

But first, a quick Super Bowl shout out to that lovable, huggable teddy bear, KC Chiefs coach Andy Reid.  I mean, if they made little snuggly Andy Reid stuffed animals, I just might sleep with it.

Huh?  TMI?  Got it.

Anyway…was there anyone on the planet NOT rooting for this guy to finally win his first SB after a couple decades of coaching…the Communists in San Francisco notwithstanding?

And denying SF Congresswoman Nervous Nancy Pelosi a Super Bowl win was the wonderfully tasty icing on top. 

All together now…FU Nancy!!! Continue reading →

If the ultimate victor in the Senate impeachment trial were based on hours of bloviating, the Dems would win in a Trumpian-style electoral blowout.

That score?  Dems 21,  GOP 12.

But like many things in life…less is more.

I sat thru virtually all of the GOP arguments…which unequivocally, systematically and fully destroyed the nonsensical and partisan impeachment articles on both a factual and Constitutional basis.

And speaking of compelling Constitutional arguments…I think I might have a man crush on Alan Dershowitz.

I feel strangely cleansed in admitting that.

And slaves to the “fair and balanced” moniker that we here at The Drunken Republican proudly share with Fox News…I reluctantly endured the House Democrat impeachment managers for several excruciating hours.

Or about as long as Michael Moore can stuff his pie hole before taking a breath. Continue reading →

Michael Jordan.  Magic Johnson.  Larry Bird.

No, I have NOT transitioned this to a hoops blog…just hang with me.

These three basketball greats were part of the original Olympic Dream Team in 1992 in Barcelona.  Old raisin heads like me…even with somewhat pickled brains…STILL remember this both fondly and vividly.

Fast forward to today’s Impeachment Olympics and those names have been replaced by Alan Dershowitz, Ken Starr, and Robert Ray.

These three brilliant legal minds have been added to President Trump’s already impressive legal Dream Team that will fight the impeach hoax, and know more about constitutional law than Michael Moore knows about saturated fat.

More importantly, though, they’re all regulars on the cable news circuit as legal experts, and thus quite comfortable in front of the camera. Continue reading →

Well, nervous Nancy inevitably caved, and finally crowbarred those contrived Impeachment Articles out of her Louis Vuitton support hose and delivered them to the Senate.

Or maybe they were cozily stashed in her very substantial cleavage…presumably right next to her “mad money.”

Who knows.

At this point…who really cares?

The fact that I even noticed her cleavage is personally disappointing…if not dreadfully concerning.

Anyway…the Holidays have come and gone, and people have moved on.  Normal people outside of NY, LA, and the DC swamp, that is.
Continue reading →

A good guy with a gun takes down a bad guy with a gun.  And saves dozens of lives.

At least.

Or as Trump always likes to describe such a situation…”bullets going in the opposite direction.”

“How sweet it is!”…to quote the great Jackie Gleason.  Ya know…Ralph Kramden?  THE HONEYMOONERS!!!

OK, going back to the 50’s.  Eh…forget it.

Anyway…surely you heard the recent story of yet another church shooting…near Ft. Worth, Texas this time…some mental defective freakazoid starts shooting, and in like three nanoseconds, a dude in the congregation who is carrying and also happens to be a firearms instructor…uh, shall we say…ELIMINATES THE THREAT.

A high-brow way of saying he blew the guy’s effing brains out.

It warms the cockles of my heart.

What are cockles, anyway?  I have no idea…I just like saying cockles.
Continue reading →