Election History For Dummies

Groucho Marx was decades ahead of his time when he said…”Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?”

Sounds like a new Dem-O-Crap party bumper sticker.

Russian collusion?  Fake Impeachment?  The Biden Crime Family?  STOLEN ELECTIONS?  Yeah.

NOTHING TO SEE HERE!  BASELESS ALLEGATIONS!  CONSPIRACY THEORY!……..RACIST!!!

Screw you, political flat-earthers.  If lying was an Olympic event, you’d be Mark Effing Spitz.

Of course, Groucho also said, “Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?”

Wise man, that Groucho.  And with my luck, the Mrs. will decide to start reading my blog THIS week.  I COULD be headed to the dog house.  Woof.

Anyway…we’re now up to about a thousand sworn affidavits…UNDER PENALTY OF PERJURY…of witnessed voter fraud totaling hundreds of thousands of votes.  And I’ve seen countless folks testify before multiple state legislatures to that effect.

Breathtaking shit, I have to tell you.  Unless you reside in a Zimbabwe zip code.

To believe Trump didn’t win this f*cking election easily would be to believe O.J. is innocent…his criminal case “acquittal” notwithstanding.

So, we’ve established massive evidence of widespread voter fraud in the battleground states…FULLY corroborated by statistical analysis by world renowned statisticians and cybersecurity gurus…who to a man, woman, or any of the 87 other options listed on job applications these days…concluded Sleepy Joe’s victory was more fake than a room full of boob jobs.

But there’s a third, and very interesting category that I would also characterize as slam dunk “corroborating” evidence…unless your hidden talent is suspending disbelief.

And that, my friends, is Election History.

In this context, we’re talking about 2020 election occurrences that render Political Scientists and students of Election History completely disoriented, in search of any voltage to shock them back into coherence.

Hey Libs…LISTEN TO THE DAMN SCIENCE!!!  Oh wait, that’s only when the “science” is consistent with your ideological proclivities.  Got it.

In no particular order…

You probably know that with mail-in ballots, there is a rejection rate.  Like a ballot isn’t signed, the signature doesn’t match what’s on record, the postmark is unreadable or missing, etc.

And while this rejection rate understandably varies, it absolutely cratered like a defective soufflé in 2020 all over the country…particularly in the states that mattered.

Clearly, the complete OPPOSITE of what SHOULD HAVE happened given the exponential rise of first time mail-in voters.

Although, makes sense to those of us paying attention, given the much lower than typical threshold settings purposely programmed for signature matching done electronically…OR the aggressively preventing of access…much of it captured on video…for Republican vote counting observers tasked with, ya know…CHECKING GODDAMN SIGNATURES.

A couple examples…

Georgia had a 6.5% rejection rate in 2016; a paltry 0.2% in 2020.

Pennsylvania had a rejection rate of just 1.0% in 2016…pretty questionable, if you ask me…but 4.5% in the 2018 midterms?  Hmmm…

In 2020, however, with exponentially more mail-ins?  A virtually non-existent 0.03%. That’s NOT a typo.  Or about the chance I have of grabbing some sushi with Ivanka Trump any time this century.

OK…THAT would be 0.0%.  At least according to the Secret Service.

But I digress.

Then, one must look at the raging…and 100% unexpected…red wave that happened.  A red wave SO raging, in fact, that while the expectation was the Dems would roll to a gain of at least 15 House seats, AND take the Senate…

…What these Libs ACTUALLY saw when they finally popped their melons from their posterior sphincter like a champagne cork…was the GOP PICKING UP MORE THAN 15 SEATS…AND likely holding the Senate.

In fact, the GOP did SO spectacularly well down-ballot, it is unfathomable that Trump…THE GUY AT THE TOP OF THE TICKET WITH UNPRECEDENTED ENTHUSIASM…could have lost in that scenario.  And because of the sheer magnitude of the red wave, split-ticket voting wouldn’t explain it.  So say the experts.  Sorry Libtards.

Oh yeah…And no incumbent President in nearly 150 years…that’s a century and a half for you math challenged folks…had GAINED votes in his re-election bid, and lost.  Trump gained a whopping 12 million votes.

This next little tasty feast of Election History is my personal favorite…the dreaded historically reliable bellwethers.

The Appetizer…No President has won in 60 years without winning both the states of Ohio and Florida.  Trump won them both big, as he did in 2016.

The Main Course…And I’ll quote from a recent article in The Federalist

“Even more unbelievably, Biden is on his way to winning the White House after having lost almost every historic bellwether county across the country.  The Wall Street Journal and The Epoch Times independently analyzed the results of 19 counties around the United States that have nearly perfect presidential voting records over the last 40 years. President Trump won every single bellwether county, except Clallam County in Washington.”

OK.  There’s NO FRIGGIN’’ WAY ON GOD’S GREEN EARTH Basement Boy win’s ONE STINKIN’ Bellwether County out of 19…and wins the election.

Without Divine Intervention.  Or cheating your ass off.

And not just one or two, mind you…but EVERY SINGLE ONE of these perennially reliable historical election norms gets ABSOLUTELY OBLITERATED?  Doesn’t happen.

UNFATHOMABLE.  IMPLAUSIBLE.  LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE.

But believe what you want.  And say hi to the Tooth Fairy for me.

It all friggin’ stinks worse than Michael Moore’s master bedroom crapper the morning after an all-night burrito binge. 

Even O.J. agrees.  You’ll have to take my word for that.

 

 

2 thoughts on “Election History For Dummies

  1. Tom B.

    Here’s how I look at this. Either:
    1) Trump won, but Biden stole the election; or
    2) Biden won

    If Biden won, then all the bluster is just inconsequential noise and not much different than the search for Sasquatch.

    If Trump won, but Biden stole the election, then he deserves the Presidency anyway for pulling off the biggest conspiracy in human history. He was able to control and manipulate the Supreme Court, State & Federal Courts, Governors, the US Attorney General, State Legislatures, the USPS, Google, Facebook and 90% of the Media. Now that’s one epic conspiracy and it required a bigger plan than the D-Day invasion.

    So, If Biden (or his secret puppet-master) can do all that, then clearly he/they are the most qualified leader in human history and we will be fine. In fact, they must also be controlling the stock market, because it’s up big since Biden’s election, which is also breaking another norm for a newly elected Democrat.

    My belief is that people voted against Trump, not for Biden and that’s how Biden won – simple. It broke a lot of norms, just like Trump broke all the norms of his Presidency.

    You have to give Biden credit. Either, he won or he out played Trump. No other conclusion is possible.

    Reply
  2. Taco Pepper

    Your evidence is weak and you lost in court > 50 times, many of which were rulings from judges appointed by Trump.

    You just don’t understand, these weren’t votes for Biden, they were 81 million votes against the worst President in US history.

    If you ever stepped away from the very small circle of conservative media sources you listen to, you would understand how many of us were compelled to vote in this election like no other.

    I didn’t vote for HRC in 2016, but I sure voted for Joe in 2020 and I could give you the names of 3 others at least in my closest circle who switched their votes in 2020.

    If this election was capable of being stolen, have no doubt it would have been by the clown who has tried every trick in the book before and after 11/3 to turn the results his way. He has lied and cheated his entire life. You know he has, and you support him anyway.

    I really hope someday you wake up and put down this whacky Q Kool-Aid you have fallen victim too. Your entire post is nothing more than ludicrous Alex Jones level BS. Americans young and old, especially four years of new voters since 2016, are sick and tired of his lies, his Twitter spew and his name-calling. This election is exactly what I told you it would be. It was not a rejection of the Republicans as a whole, just a rejection of a corrupt and incompetent liar who was exposed from day one as an absolute joke around the world.

    Now Trump will pout like a baby and skip the inauguration, even after Obama welcomed him to the White House after being slandered by Trump for years.

    We both grew up playing sports and watching sports. Remember what our parents and coaches told us? Fight like hell on the field, but at the end of the game, shake your opponents hand, congratulate him or her and recognize that the game and your common ground mattered way more than your differences.

    The SCOTUS, packed with Trump appointees, LAUGHED at your case and threw it in the trash where it belongs. You can either be an American and move on, or you can continue to try and tear this country apart. Maybe you can even have more of your candidates win in the future, we saw a pretty broad dismissal of extreme left politics across the board.

    But please, give this nonsense up. It’s over, you lost. Trump lost the popular vote by a large margin in both elections, and a few swing states that supported Obama in ‘08 and ‘12 before flipping to Trump in ‘16 flipped back because of his abhorrent behavior as President and his woeful miscalculations on the pandemic.

    It’s over. You lost.

    Reply

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