If the ultimate victor in the Senate impeachment trial were based on hours of bloviating, the Dems would win in a Trumpian-style electoral blowout.
That score? Dems 21, GOP 12.
But like many things in life…less is more.
I sat thru virtually all of the GOP arguments…which unequivocally, systematically and fully destroyed the nonsensical and partisan impeachment articles on both a factual and Constitutional basis.
And speaking of compelling Constitutional arguments…I think I might have a man crush on Alan Dershowitz.
I feel strangely cleansed in admitting that.
And slaves to the “fair and balanced” moniker that we here at The Drunken Republican proudly share with Fox News…I reluctantly endured the House Democrat impeachment managers for several excruciating hours.
Or about as long as Michael Moore can stuff his pie hole before taking a breath.
Now, we’re in the questioning phase, with the dreaded witness battle to come.
Please, just make it f*cking stop.
Not going to regurgitate any of the gory detail. THE CROWD CHEERS!
But if you would indulge me in the following rants…
The first of which is a simple harkening back to the very beginning.
As I’ve written ad nauseam, the simple fact that impeachment was promised to us three nanoseconds after The Donald had his way with Hillary on November 8th, 2016…electorally speaking, that is…
Then the biggest scandal in U.S history…the phony, corrupt, and massively illegal Russian Collusion set-up, where Bob Mueller ultimately..and beautifully…used the Trump-hating scammer’s collective mouths as a commode…
Perp walks to come.
And now we’re to take ANY of THIS shit seriously. I mean…SERIOUSLY?
Epic absurdity.
And how many other things do these obsessed Leftist nitwits ALREADY have tee’d up for Trump’s second term? My God.
ARE WE GETTING THIS YET, FOR SHIT’S SAKE!!!
Here’s a little message for the Trump-hating leg-wetters out there crying like little bitches for witnesses…
IT’S NOT THE PRESIDENT’S BURDEN TO PROVE HIS INNOCENCE, YOU STUPID F’ING NUMB NUTS!!!
It was the House’s responsibility to do a FULL investigation…INCLUDING ANY WITNESSES THEY DEEMED NECESSARY…bring a case, wrap it up in a nice bow, and present it to the Senate…PERIOD.
THEY ALONE controlled the process. And they took FULL advantage.
They denied the President calling witnesses. They called 17.
They denied the President EVER having his counsel present.
They leaked out-of-context, cherry-picked information to their submissive kissing cousins in the fake news media to create an equally fake narrative.
Rigged and unfair all day long. But fine. Fine.
And now…F*CKING NOW…they’re screaming for MORE witnesses they wouldn’t call themselves because THEY wanted to ram through impeachment before Santa strapped Rudolph to the goddamn sleigh???
If someone has the nads to argue how that’s NOT dropping a big steamy pile on the Constitution…I’m all ears.
I won’t hold my breath.
The Senate has zero…ZERO…obligation or duty to call ANY witnesses the House opted NOT to call for purely partisan and political purposes.
NONE. NADA. END OF STORY.
To give them a single goddamn witness is to get completely played by Pelosi and Schiff.
Ain’t happening, Libs.
WHY AM I EXPLAINING THIS!!! WHAT KIND OF RAVING MORON EVEN TAKES ANY OF THIS SERIOUSLY, ANYWAY!!!
I need a stiff drink.
C’mon, I’m the DRUNKEN REPUBLICAN. It’s ALWAYS cocktail hour.
Bottom line regarding the witness canard…No matter how much you acquiesce to the Democrat’s demands…they’ll ALWAYS want more…ALWAYS bitch…and ALWAYS accuse you of nefarious motives.
You could give them every effing witness they’re jonesing for, free Surf & Turf at Morton’s for a year, and top it all off with a happy ending at Suki’s Asian Massage Emporium…and they’d STILL bitch.
So why give a shit?
Uh…that was a rhetorical question.
Meanwhile…JUST DURING THIS IMPEACHMENT HOAX THE PAST FEW MONTHS, Trump has completed his biggest bipartisan victory in the new U.S./Mexico/Canada Trade Agreement…Signed Phase 1 of a first EVER, historic trade deal with China…Killed the worst terrorist on the planet…Reduced illegal border crossings by 75%…And released a detailed framework for an Israeli/Palestinian peace deal.
The mile long list of other accomplishments the past three years notwithstanding.
Some threat to the Republic, huh?