I have quite a sentimental affinity for Creepy Joe Biden.
You see…Bumbling Biden played an instrumental role in losing my blogging virginity on August 17, 2016, in an aptly titled dissertation called “Crazy Uncle Joe.”
It was basically a response to a campaign speech he delivered somewhere while stumping for Crooked Hillary. I methodically and gleefully tore apart every stupid Trump-Hating sentiment he regurgitated with the usual hysterical breathless fury.
Angry bastards, those Democrats. Some things never change.
This time, however, I’m gonna stick up for Creepy Joe…and I DO say that affectionately. I’m sorry, but I’m not down with the Sniveling Socialist grievance mob making him twist in the wind like a palm tree in a hurricane.
So what great leg-wetting, sky-is-falling revelation have they uncovered? Joe Biden can be a little…ahem…huggy, handsy, and sniffy at times?
Wow, you could knock me over with a f*cking feather with that one. What’s next? It’s cold in the North Pole?
C’mon, he’s no Harvey Weinstein.
Let’s be perfectly candid…the scent of a woman’s hair can be quite intoxicating. And as such, I see nothing wrong with a little bit of a sniffy-poo now and then.
Damn Pantene…gets me EVERY time. The cocaine of shampoos.
Ok, THAT was a little creepy. True…but creepy.
Anyway…Biden’s penchant to be overly…um…“familiar,” shall we say?…is the worst kept secret since it was revealed Michael Moore shops for new clothes in the Lard Ass section.
Not to mention there are more years of video of Joe’s octopus act out there for public consumption than there is of Nutso Cranck and Aunt Esther look-alike Maxine Waters squealing, “Impeach 45!…Impeach 45!”
So yeah…I’m calling bullshit on this whole sordid mess, right here and now.
C’mon…This ain’t our first rodeo. This is nothing but a well orchestrated opposition research drip, drip, drip roll-out by at least one of the 2020 Dem candidates…although they’re all laughably denying it.
Lucy Flores delivered the first shot across the bow. It seems Joe “sniffed” her hair five years ago WHILE STUMPING FOR HER AT A CAMPAIGN EVENT for her 2014 failed bid for Nevada Lieutenant Governor.
Cry me a river, Lucy.
So let me get this straight…We’re to believe you’re SOOOO traumatized all of a sudden that we should en masse demand that Crazy Uncle Joe be immediately added to the nearest sex offender registry?
Please. I’m sure this has NOTHING AT ALL to do with you being a ginormous Bernie Sanders supporter…eh, Lucy?
Norms have changed in the age of #MeToo, we’re told. Pretty evident. And maybe Joe would be well advised to throttle back a smidge on the nuzzling and sniffing. Prudent advice.
But here’s a little news flash for ya…the concept of “personal space” wasn’t invented in 2019. And Joe’s been innocently and good-naturedly violating it forever. And everyone’s treated it as a big effing joke for an eternity…until now, that is…JUST as he’s on the verge of declaring his 2020 presidential candidacy.
Please. The timing is fishier than a flounder rotting in the blazing afternoon sun.
And if YOU can’t smell the bullshit here, YOU may need an olfactory transplant.
And for the record…Obama’s silence has been more deafening than that AC/DC concert I wandered into back in the 80’s, and wandered out with my ears ringing like a Good Humor truck.
Thanks for nuthin’ Barry.
The few women that have come forward so far to claim some sort of non-consensual sniffing PTSD are nothing but a figurative big, bloody horse head in Creepy Joe’s bed.
Declare your candidacy at your own risk, Joe. This was just the appetizer. And trust us…you don’t want ANY part of the main course.
YOU’VE. BEEN. WARNED.
This whole Feigned-Outrage-A-Thon is a pathetic joke. I’ll reserve my harsh #MeToo scorn for the Weinstein’s and Lauer’s of the world…not for a guy that hugs two seconds too long.
The hard truth? Democrats and Hollywood Libs don’t give rat’s ass about these women. They have quite demonstrably cheapened #MeToo to nothing more than a weapon brandished for political gain and to destroy opponents. Nothing more, nothing less.
It’s called being Kavanaugh’d.