Multi-Tasker-In-Chief

If you wasted your precious time listening to the liberal mainstream media numb nuts, you would think that other than Russia, Russia, Russia, Trump’s impending impeachment, and his alleged affinity for porn stars (uh, join the club)…everything in the world was just hunky-dory.  The American public, en masse, CAN’T be THAT stupid.  Even liberals…Nancy Pelosi and Maxine Waters notwithstanding.  I mean, they are to stupid, what Queen Elizabeth is to royalty.  Anyway, as the weekly conveyor belt of issues accelerates like the parade of chocolates in that classic I Love Lucy episode, the AWOL media MUST be somewhere over in Moscow dropping acid, basking in Trump impeachment hallucinations…’cause they aren’t here doing their friggin’ jobs, that’s for DAMN sure…

President Trump is often called “The Great Negotiator,” but add to that “The Great Multi-Tasker.”  I mean, this guy can juggle monumental issues like the creepy clown juggling balls at a 5-year-old’s birthday bash at Chuck-E-Cheese.  Here’s a couple that popped for me last week…

The Gift That Keeps On Giving

While the illegal immigration issue was front and center in the 2016 election, it sure seems headed for the same top billing in 2020.  Like Roseanne Rosannadanna used to say on SNL, “It’s ALWAYS something.”  First, town after town in The People’s Republic of California are actually joining the Trump administration lawsuit AGAINST California’s illegal, inexplicable and dangerous sanctuary state laws.  Wow.  I always read there were people in California who were NOT open border Socialists, but I thought it was just urban legend.  Anyway, kudos to those trying to stop the immigration madness.  If it were me?  I’d just do my Chevy Chase imitation, fire up the Family Truckster, and get the hell out of Dodge.  To each his own, I suppose.

Secondly, The Donald is coordinating with border state Governors to put some National Guard on the southern border to provide greatly needed assistance to the border patrol.  The Governors were all down with this…except, of course, Calif. Gov. Jerry “Citizens Be Damned” Brown, who after several days of hand wringing reluctantly agreed to participate, but only as it relates to criminal activity…NOT to enforce federal immigration law.  Wait, what?  Oh yeah, that would be racist…or something.

Predictably, this latest action by Trump to deprive Democrats of future voters reportedly drove the entire media to crash the Depends website in their collective quest to stop the uncontrollable leakage.  Apparently they hand’em out in newsrooms nowadays like condoms at your local Planned Parenthood office.  Of course, when Obama did the EXACT same thing…and both Bush’s too…nary an eyebrow was raised.  I gotta tell ya…the 24/7 hypocrisy, double standard, and leg-wetting by the Left and media over anything Trump does is really starting to sap my strength.  ANY action taken by President Trump on ANY issue on ANY day of the week…no matter how mainstream or with historical precedent…is construed as motivated by the most nefarious of intentions.  On the Leftist Respect-O-Meter, Trump is at least a few notches below Jack the Ripper.  Whatever.  Nobody’s buying that tired act anyway…liberal elite snowflakes sipping lattes behind twelve-foot walls and armed guards notwithstanding.

To Tariff or NOT to Tariff?

What I just said about the constant overreactions to Trump?  This tariff hysteria is so high on THAT list, Snoop Dogg would be proud.  First, all this tariff talk (other than the limited steel and aluminum tariffs directed at trade cheaters) is just that…talk.  Everything is a negotiation…remember?  As promised, Trump World is negotiating new trade deals individually with about every country on the planet…most notably, China.  Like Michael Moore has eating utensils in his toolbox, The Donald has tariffs.  Nothing’s been enacted yet, and likely won’t.  Let’s just sit back, relax, and watch our Magician-In-Chief channel his inner David Copperfield and make our current crappy trade deals disappear.

And one last thing…to all the lying politicians out there who so condescendingly lecture us all about “free trade”…WE DON’T HAVE FREE TRADE NOW, YOU DUMBASSES!  THAT’S WHY TRUMP IS DOING THIS!  So, instead of kvetching for decades about China, intellectual property theft, massive trade deficits, and dying American industries…and doing NOTHING but flapping gums…Trump is trying to solve the problem by taking on China (& others) head on.  Here’s some friendly advice for The Swamp…if you’re not gonna help Trump as he tries to solve every problem either created or exacerbated by your cowardly inaction, or sheer incompetence, over the past several decades, just get the hell out of the way.  Go dedicate a new rest stop on I-95 or something.  You know, something flaccid and milque toast enough so as not to jeopardize your next precious election.

Next Week Sneak Peek

Hot off the presses…FBI raids the office and home of Trump’s personal attorney, Michael Cohen.  President Xi Jinping of China starting to move on trade, announcing a lowering of tariffs on auto imports into China.  Lastly, President Trump and his War Team mulling over exactly how and when they’re going to kick the living shit out of Animal Assad and Syria over latest gas attack on his own people.  A full plate for most…a mere starter for our Multi-Tasker-In-Chief.

Gonna let these things marinate for a week or so before I bestow upon you my insightful analysis…or unhinged rantings…depending on your perspective.

 

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